At the Intersection of Passion & Purpose

“Passion is not a plan. Passion is a feeling, and feelings change.”

Terri Trespicio

When we seek “God’s calling,” are we seeking what we’re passionate about… or what we’re made for?

Every freshman at my college is required to take the “freshman core.” It’s comprised of four classes, one per every eight weeks, for the duration of the school year. The second in  the series is essentials of behavioral science, more commonly referred to as “Essentials.”

That class sticks out in my memory for many reasons. My break out group (a cohort of maybe eight opinionated freshmen guided by a laid-back upperclassman) was particularly vocal. Our discussion time regularly dissolved into debate, and Essentials provided plenty of material.

One of the people who lectured, a professional counselor or something similar, spoke about self-actualization. In short, each person has two versions of themselves: the current version and an idealized version. The two circles slowly overlap as we grow and mature and all the rest. In the end, we should strive to have them overlap completely, so that our current self is identical to the idealized version.

Our professor meant no harm. She was simply sharing a key concept as it pertained to our subject. She never touted it as gospel.

But self-actualization unsettled me. It seemed so self-centered, so driven by personal gain. I was repulsed by it; and believe me, so was my break out group. We were all happy to share our thoughts on the subject, post-lecture.

At its root, self-actualization is the desire to attain full potential. It’s also a common first-world approach to life. “Are we really seeking God’s calling? Or are we desperately seeking importance and fulfillment?” asks Julie Roys, author of “Redeeming the Feminine Soul.” Passion is self and pleasure-oriented, but purpose is quite the opposite. It looks outward. It is others-oriented. And it tends to be long-term. It “gives more weight to meaning that pleasure,” one author noted.

Although passion can inform and fuel purpose, it cannot be its replacement. Although it’s often the inspiration for positive growth, passion is fickle; it “is a feeling, and feelings change.” For instance, I’m passionate about ending human trafficking. But what good would I do if I charged into Wellspring International and demanded that I be sent to the worst red light district in India? That decision would be driven by self-gratification… and the sense that I can end trafficking faster and more effectively than someone who is trained to do so. The people at Wellspring would tell me to go home and support them in a different way. A way that allows purpose to command and capitalize on passion, and direct both to the desired outcome.

Passion is healthy. Care about what matters, and care deeply. But purpose is what we all should invest careful time and thought into: Purpose that’s acted upon changes our world and the people in it. It’s Kingdom-building. In fact, I believe our purpose is identical to God’s calling; passion only fans that flame into a voracious, powerful fire.

Portraits: Mitch Randall

You know those people who make class discussions interesting, dinnertime more delightful, game nights hilarious? Yeah, that’s Mitch.

Mitch is equal parts sunny and insightful. He greets people by name and remembers facts about their lives. He has a knack for engaging in lighthearted conversation with professors and staff and peers and whoever else he meets. And I’m grateful to call him friend!

Money and the Soul’s Necessity

Superfluous wealth can buy superfluities only. Money is not required to buy one necessity of the soul.

Henry David Thoreau

I’ve spent much of the weekend pondering my financial future. It doesn’t look particularly bleak; nor is it staggeringly bountiful. It’s par for someone of my age and job and season.

But I’m sick of all the numbers. They try to tabulate and quantify my happiness. Satisfaction. Contentment. In reality, those numbers are just that: numbers. My happiness is to be found elsewhere, like a walk on a glowy evening with the people I like best. Or a hot cup of coffee from the best cafe in the Village. Or the joy of cooking a meal for a group of two or three.

Sure, those things require money to some extent. But the payback is much larger than the cup I pour my coffee into or the roast I bake in my oven. My investment is returned in hours of conversation and the simple, delightfully homey scent of micro-roasted coffee.

There’s sense in savings, though. As I balanced my budget this weekend, I also detailed a list of 11 items I would like to eventually own or experience. Top of the list is a down payment on a house. For instance, if I squirrel away $100 per month for 150 months (or about 6 years) I’ll have enough to purchase a small home in a nice neighborhood. (Or a larger fixer-upper in the proverbial “west side.” I’ll take either, thanks; I speak fluent ghetto.)

That yet-to-be home is important to me. I want a house of my own; therefore, I’m going to save until I can purchase one without shooting my financial future in the foot.

Starting now, I plan to steward what I make in the wisest way I know how. God has been exceedingly kind to me: I enter adult life sans college debt and with a shockingly small monthly rent. I have the freedom to sort through my wants and needs and plan for both without worrying. I know not everyone starts life this way, but we all have the option to budget well and plan for the future. The key is to work with what we have, not what we wish we had.

On a related note, I highly suggest this post from Desiring God Blog. Maybe it will inspire your decisions as it has inspired mine.

Warning: No Temporary Fixes Found

Note: This post marks the advent of a new style of blogging, a style I hope is more true to my mindset and lifestyle. Alongside my usual photo session sneak peeks, I’ll post musings about life as a young adult in the professional world. I’m glad you’re along for the ride.

Scrambled weather. Lightning forecast. Earthbound way to start the day: buttered oatmeal, fresh berries, river of thick cream. So soothed.

Ruth Reichl (@ruthreichl)

I hesitate to type my thoughts into existence. My degree and career are tied to connection and communication; I know how many people can access and judge what I write. Simultaneously, writing (even to an unknown audience) is my best practice, my outlet, my balm. I must write, or else cease to think in a straight line.

I can guess what sort of people will read this: my parents, grandparents, cousins, friends and acquaintances from high school. I welcome each of you. Maybe my lessons-learned will help you along your own journey.

Developing a Voice

My name is Abby,  and I’m a young professional. I manage all outbound and internal communication for a small-but-growing non-profit.  In my spare time, I read books, take pictures, help lead a young adults ministry at church and feed home-cooked meals to my friends.

At least that’s the go-to bio. The one I recite when new people invariably ask. That’s what I do. But who I am is another matter.

For some time, I’ve felt disconnected from my own voice. You could’ve hung an “Under Construction” sign around my neck for years. I wrote first for my mom, then for professors, now for my boss and the public at large. But writers are artists and they are known in the same manner as photographers and painters: by their style. Their voice. My voice.

This isn’t another self-help blog to make you feel better about your situation or find a temporary fix. There are no quick cures for a broken heart or rerouted plans, no time-turners to mend the past, no TARDIS to manage the future. Here, you will only find real stories.  Real stories from a real person who is fed up with social constructs and misplaced priorities and empty promises.

I draw inspiration from Kristen Morris, Hannah Martin, Ellie B and more… these ladies are truly special. They know what it means to be genuine.  And that’s what I’m reaching for, too: A Jane Eyre complex, if you will.

So let’s get started. Hello, friend; welcome to my corner of the internet, where truth isn’t relative and kindness is a premium.

The Mind of an Actor (2/3)

This is part two; read the first post here.

There are layers of complexity in “Measure for Measure” that require an incredible amount of effort. For instance, because there are only five AFTLS members, each is required to play three-to-four characters. Gerrard plays Duke Vincentio, Froth, Barnadine and a friar. “It’s really fun,” Gerrard said. “You have your major roles- mine is the Duke. We discovered that 30 percent of the play is the Duke talking.”

Sometimes these characters overlap in a scene. The actors are, in effect, talking to themselves. And yet, the audience is entirely convinced there is more than one person on stage. This happy trick is played on the mind throughout the whole of “Measure for Measure.”

But the overlapping roles are not a handicap. In fact, it is a welcome reprieve and challenge. “I swap from the Duke to the friar and Froth,” Gerrard explained. This style of acting is difficult but satisfying: He gets to play more than one character. “But it’s the audience that makes it work,” Gerrard added. “The Duke and the friar are the same person, and you want the audience to know that.” When these characters overlap within a scene, the audience must imagine that they are, in fact, different people; otherwise, the scene falls flat.

Gerrard paused in his explanation to smile and wave cheerfully at someone over my shoulder. “It’s Peter,” he said. “Here he comes! You can interview both of us.”

Peter Bray is tall and broad-shouldered. His smooth, chiseled face, wiry hair and dark eyes are a striking combination. He also wears a polo, though his is dark grey. Like Gerrard, Bray’s eyes communicate an abiding, although more reserved, passion for theatre. I ask him the question I had posed to Gerrard: What is it like to play more than one character, especially when they overlap in a scene?

“It’s really exciting,” Bray said, animation in his deep voice. “There’s extreme demand. At the drop of a hat — literally — you have to have rapid access to a different character; you have to step into a mask.”

Before “Measure for Measure,” neither Bray nor Gerrard had assumed several characters within the same scene. Drama school prepared them to access the level of required ability, but it was never directly addressed. Both agreed that there is a level of mystery involved. They get to “let the audience in” on the secret. The audience feels as though they understand something about the characters and the actors themselves; that is what makes “Measure for Measure” so compelling.

“It’s an ongoing process,” Gerrard continued. He leaned forward, eager for me to understand. “We’re still getting better. You never really finish it, and nothing really prepares you.”

“It takes more than time,” Bray nodded. “It takes extreme attention and brain fuel.” After even an hour of practice, Bray said, the team is exhausted.

But what role is the audience play in a performance? Much more than you might assume; it goes beyond laughter and facial expressions. The third and final installment will be this Friday!

Mikel Family | The Steadiest Love

“There is no doubt that it is around the family and the home that all the greatest virtues, the most dominating virtues of human society, are created, strengthened, and maintained.” – Winston Churchill

I’ve known Betsy for years. She was my first friend in college and remains one of my closest. Today, I got to photograph her beautiful family.

The Mikel family is steady and calm. They’re gentle with each other, and deeply loving. (The littlest one is especially treasured.) And yet, there’s an undercurrent of humor: Mr. Mikel jogging to stay warm, Mrs. Mikel playing peek-a-boo with the baby, Nate and Abe sandwiching Betsy in a hug and making faces.

Family is such a gift!

Stillman Family | A Foray into Photographing Huskies

“There is no happiness like that of being loved by your fellow creatures, and feeling that your presence is an addition to their comfort.” – Jane Eyre

Dylan and Megan arrived for our session in full autumn garb, and they’re as sweetly genuine as they look! They share deep admiration and love; neither would be quite right without the other.

I quickly discovered that photographing huskies is no mean feat… but oh, just gaze into those mismatched eyes! No wonder Megan and Dylan chose to adopt both pups.

Taking Stock and Looking Forward

Today, I get to share the first of a long-anticipated series. It’s been days in the making. (What better way to launch back into a season of blogging!) But before I do, let me explain something…

For those who don’t know, photography is only part of what I do. The majority of my life is bound up in words: reading and writing them.

The thing is, I’m surrounded by people who have incredible stories. So, during the next few weeks, the face of this blog will change. Fewer images; more words. Powerful words. Hopeful words. Words that will inspire and challenge you.

In the meantime, here is the first of three exciting posts. No other introduction is needed; grab a cup of coffee (or Earl Grey tea) and enjoy the read.

The Mind of an Actor (1/3)

It was a lovely Saturday morning. I slammed my car door and walked across the parking lot, double-checking to make sure I had a pen; two pens, actually. Just in case.

The hotel lobby, modestly sized, was busy. I blinked as my eyes adjusted, noting breakfast foods on the sidebar and hotel guests with rumpled hair and sleepy eyes. I was immediately greeted by an unassuming gentleman with a familiar face. “I’m Dom,” he said, and held out his hand for a perfunctory handshake before leading me across the lobby. “Is this table okay?”

Dominic Gerrard stands maybe five-foot-eight, round-shouldered, wearing a maroon polo with the collar flipped up. His ernest hazel gaze betrays a lifetime of professional theatre. I am the most recent of countless interviews he has given; yet he speaks with such giddy enthusiasm, it is as though he has never talked about his profession before.

We dive into my questions after a brief introduction. He uses words like “term” instead of “semester,” “whiz around” instead of “travel.” His vocabulary is much wider than the average person’s, and my shorthand grows progressively messier as I race to record every English-accented syllable. Around us, conversation ebbs; everyone there has chosen the right hour to eat breakfast.

Gerrard started acting early in life. As a pre-teen, he auditioned for a role in “Les Miserables” in London’s West End. He got the part and was immediately hooked. “Acting was all I wanted to do,” Gerrard said. In the following years, he continued a normal education until he was old enough “to attend university,” at which point he applied to many prestigious drama schools. Ultimately, he decided to attend the Royal Central School of Speech and Drama in London.

But what brought this talented Londoner to the heart of Hooiser country? Gerrard, and four other professionals, are a part of Actors From The London Stage (AFTLS). This is Gerrard’s first time touring with world-renowned troupe. “It’s really fun to whiz around,” Gerrard said. The unique format used by AFTLS appeals to him. “It’s our job to try and hook the audience into the play,” he explained. “Americans seem to really like Shakespeare. There’s a lot of positive energy when we perform.” He also enjoys visiting college campuses and “crashing classrooms” with workshops.

Every year, AFTLS travels the United States to visit colleges. With each new location, the troupe must reorient themselves with the play they are scheduled to perform. Sometimes, there is a four-day gap between performances. “Upon arrival,” Gerrard said, “We usually practice for about four hours.” They bring only what can be easily transported by plane: a single suitcase of simple props. Beyond that, the team requires only five chairs. “We turn that into an advantage,” Gerrard said.  “We ask the audience to imagine, and fill in the gaps. It’s abnormal.” Especially when Gerrard must play two characters within the same scene…

There’s much more to this story! The next installment will be posted on Wednesday, Nov. 1.

Thompson Family | Sunny Summer Portraits

“Life is a collection of a million, billion moments, tiny little moments and choices, like a handful of luminous, glowing pearl. It takes so much time, and so much work, and those beads and moments are so small, and so much less fabulous and dramatic than the movies. But this is what I’m finding, in glimpses and flashes: this is it. This is it, in the best possible way. That thing I’m waiting for, that adventure, that move-score-worthy experience unfolding gracefully. This is it. Normal, daily life ticking by on our streets and sidewalks, in our houses and apartments, in our beds and at our dinner tables, in our dreams and prayers and fights and secrets – this pedestrian life is the most precious thing any of use will ever experience.” — Shauna Niequist

Worshiping the Real Thing

While in France, we visited several historic cathedrals. Most were built over decades, progressively expanded as finances and resources permitted. As a result, some of these cathedrals look a bit mismatched.

For example, this image shows the Basilique du Sacré-Coeur de Paray-le-Monial. The right tower was built long before the left; even the stonework is different!

The history behind this Basilique is especially important in Catholic tradition. In 1673, Marguerite-Marie Alacoque, a Roman-Catholic nun, had a revelation about the Sacred Heart of Jesus. She believed it represented his love for all humanity. Since then, Jesus’ heart has become an object of special devotion.

“A true image of God is not to be found in all the world; and hence… His glory is defiled, His truth corrupted by the lie, whenever He is set before our eyes in visible form.” John Calvin

I read Calvin’s quote yesterday. Our human hearts are hungry to worship something or someone. We were made to worship God. But even if our trajectory is accurate, we easily worship a mere shadow of the real thing. For example, meditating on the “sacred heart” of Jesus rather than the King Himself. Or focusing on making our lives so easy, we worship comfort rather than the Comforter.

After a vivid description of the Lord, scripture asks, “To whom then will you liken God, or what likeness compare with him?” (Isaiah 40:18) The question is unanswerable. “It’s purpose is to remind us that it is as absurd as it is impious to think that an image modeled, as images must be, upon some creature could be an acceptable likeness of the Creator (Packer, 46).

Just another reason I’m glad to have visited France: A bigger perspective on God and how I should worship Him.

To learn more: Knowing God by J.I. Packer; The Sacred Heart of Jesus